Currently, there are well over 2,000,000 marriages reported in the United States and the divorce rate is 2,9 per 1,000 population. Studies have repeatedly confirmed that the first two years of marriage is when a divorce is most likely to happen.

However, there is no divorce-proof period. This can happen even in decade-long marriages. The number of gray divorces has doubled between 1990 and 2008. Also, it has been observed that the Western and Southern regions have reported a higher gray divorce rate.

There can be many reasons why a marriage may end after a long time, but this rarely happens on a whim. The life built together weighs heavily on such decisions. A couple can seek divorce for falling out of love, abuse, or for broken trust.

1. The Stigma of Divorce

Divorce has been invested with stigma for a long time, and it continues to be so to some extent. However, society has made progress in de-stigmatizing separation. We have reached a point where even the Catholic Church is (re)considering their stance on the issue.

Separation does not really figure into the Baby Boomer mentality. They are used to working hard on resolving issues. However, some issues simply cannot be worked away. When these build up, the pile of unresolved problems might erupt in a divorce.

2. Falling out of Love

It is disputed whether falling out of love is enough to justify divorce or not. Many factors come into play, like religion and ethics, to mention just a few. However, let us focus on the legal aspect.

Nowadays, all states, including the District of Columbia, have embraced no-fault divorce. However, processes differ, which is why it is so useful to have a qualified lawyer by your side. The first state to pass a no-fault divorce law was California, and the last one to do so was New York.

3. Broken Trust

Trust is one of the foundation stones of marriage. This creates a safe haven where both partners can seek refuge from worldly troubles. When this lifeline is broken, the marriage may lose its protective cloak. It will turn into a toxic environment, where spouses do not feel comfortable and are under constant stress.

Many actions can lead to mistrust; here are a few of the most common ones:

• Infidelity, either emotional or physical.
• Disrespectful behavior.
• Making big decisions as an individual rather than a couple.
• Oversharing personal information without the consent of the other.
• Repeatedly embarrassing the spouse in public.

4. Abuse

A decade-old marriage might have been plagued by abuse for many years, but it is also possible that it had a late-onset. Abuse can take many forms, the main ones being:

• Physical
• Psychological
• Sexual
• Financial

If the abuse has been going on for a long time, it can be very difficult for the victim to break free. Support from family and friends is essential in this process. Elder women, especially, find it very difficult to leave. They are weighed down by economic dependence or fear of being sent to a nursing home. A late start for the abuse can be due to worsening health conditions or frustration built up over the years. Regardless, these reasons should not be excuses.

If you have noticed signs of abuse on your loved one, do not hesitate to contact experts. You could reach out to a call center and get in touch with people who specialize in this domain. However, you should also consider having a consultation with a lawyer. They will be able to paint a clear picture for you on the legal grounds for separation.

5. Sexual Preferences

The hit TV series Grace and Frankie brings into focus this still taboo subject. Being confronted with the changed sexual orientation of the partner can be particularly difficult news to process, as it might elicit conflicting emotions. In a study about the experience of women whose husbands came out, they have reported feelings of anger, loss but also empathy for their spouse. Women have also expressed concern over societal prejudice regarding their situation.

The transition to the newly divorced status was easier if positive communication was maintained with the former partner. To reach a state of resolution, both parties must reconfigure their selves as individuals, separate from the couple. This process is often more difficult for the spouse who did not initiate the divorce proceedings.

Conclusion

Gray divorce is on the rise, which brings under public scrutiny a previously overlooked topic. Divorce can be a difficult transition process, but it does not have to be so. With the help of experts and through the support of loved ones, it can become easier.

About the author:

Lynda King has a solid education in law and a successful career. However, she wished to expand her impact on the legal community and her outreach to the public. That is why she chose to represent farzadlaw.com through her writing. Lynda is honored to share her experience and knowledge to help people better understand everyday legal matters.